The Truth Behind ‘If I Can, Anybody Can’

"If I can, anybody can" — I can’t remember how many times I have heard this phrase. I feel the same when I look at my life. If 10 years ago, somebody told me that this is where I would be 10 years from now, I would have said there is no way that can happen. But guess what, it did!

However, when I hear this phrase, especially from motivational speakers, I feel that they discount certain key elements that led them to where they are today. It didn’t “just happen”, they made it happen, I made it happen! Relentless efforts, determination, hard work and courage to keep moving forward – all these factors are discounted by just saying "If I can, anybody can".

I would rather rephrase it as —

“If I can, anybody can, as long as you have the willpower and determination to keep going"

To me, the second part is very important. I wouldn’t be here if I’d given up during my free fall—if I hadn’t worked hard, or found the courage to dream even when it felt pointless.

When I was young, I had stage fright. And I still do, except now it's disguised as nervousness. I don’t like attention which is the first thing you encounter when you get on that stage. But over time, I realized that when I am talking about something I am passionate about, believe in and am good at, I did not feel that scared. Once I got into a rhythm after the initial few seconds of my presentation or speech, my confidence grew and I began to speak with ease. Those first few seconds were the key and I knew that if I wanted to deliver my presentation, I would have to keep going and I did. After several disastrous performances, it became easier to get over my fear and finally discovered the way to a spectacular performance.

I could easily tell you today—"If I can get over stage fright, anybody can". While that may be true, the part about how I did it is the key which highlights that I did not just "get over it". I had to discover what I needed to do in order to overcome that fear. This is where you can put your thinking hat on and try to find your "safe spot" - and that just might help you get over that fright. For me, that safe spot was the content I chose to present. I vividly remember a scene in "The Hunger Games" where Katniss was supposed to be on stage and her stylist, Cinna, the only person she was comfortable around, advised her to talk to the audience as if she is talking to him. That right there could be your safe spot—having a familiar face in the audience or imagining you are talking to your "Cinna".

But internal fears weren't the only battles I faced. In fact, my biggest test began when I arrived in the US. Coming to the US was supposed to be my fresh start and I knew I had it in me to fulfil my dreams. But I quickly realized that it won't be easy. And now when my life was truly at a point where there was no going down further, I had to make a decision to do everything in my power to rise up.

As Natasha Bedingfield says—"No one else can feel it for you, only you can let it in". That line stayed with me—not because it’s poetic, but because it was my turning point. In that moment I knew self-love had to be my responsibility. When I looked at others, it felt as if they are already a step ahead of me. It wasn’t just about starting over—it was about learning how value, confidence, and connection are perceived in a culture I was still trying to decode. I was determined to go all in to build the life of my dreams in the culture I had embraced. However, today when I look back at the person I was, I often ask myself—how did I get here? I discovered that the answer lies in perseverance and grit.

I love to listen to motivational speeches as it is often very inspirational and relatable and at times it strikes me when the iron is hot, when I am going through something and need a little boost to keep going. But when I hear that phrase, it can plant seeds of doubt—maybe they succeeded because they had something I don’t. And maybe that means I can’t. It's a well-intentioned truth but it often misses the nuance that it is not easy. They often don't realize that it is giving false hopes to their audience. False hope generally does not come from optimism—it comes from omitting the process. And use of that phrase often misses the full context of the situation that led them to believe in it.

So let me tell you today that "If I can build this life, anybody can—if you have the willpower and courage to keep moving forward". It's not just about possibility. It's about process.